I mean seriously, have you ever heard of someone dying from good manners? Or being grievously injured? I think not. If I am wrong, feel free to inform me.
One of my earlier posts, from a time I had all kinds of shit to say and posted nearly everyday – sometimes twice if I was excited, had to do with text etiquette. It was a sort of tongue-in- cheek bit of satire ish with a good foundation of truth to the proper way to text someone and what to and not to do.
You can read it here if you like –
Go ahead, I’ll wait. Getting kind of hungry so you read, I’ll make a sandwich. If you aren’t going to read it now, bookmark it for later. It’s quite entertaining.
I am not a fan of rules but I am a fan of manners. It may be a contradiction, a paradox even, as manners are generally rules to behaving towards other people and behaving ourselves in a socially acceptable manner.
Since when do I care about being socially acceptable? When it comes to decency and consideration of another human being, I am down to bring out my good manners.
I have noticed a disturbing trend of late. A decided obvious shift in politeness and regard for our fellow man. As in, there isn’t much.
One of the things I see bringing out the worst in people in the way of manners is technology, specifically smartphones. Don’t get me wrong, I love my phone as much as the next person (maybe not as much as some people) but it’s appalling how the focus on our technology takes the focus off humanity.
In this day and age we are so super connected – we aren’t connected with each other anymore. Common decency, common sense and plain good manners are remnants of the past it seems.
I can stand here on a soapbox and voice my concerns and observations, except I have no idea where one obtains a soapbox and it’s easier to just get to the point with how not to be a rude ass when you have your phone and are around people.
Yes I know, it’s called Text Etiquette 2 – this isn’t all and only about texting though. I like the title, and we all know sequels fall short of the original – so I had to nail it with the title. Or something.
I rolled a couple of other titles around first –
Smartphones are Making us Dumb
Can You Not?
As in can you not be so rude?
- When in the presence of another human being, put your phone away.
That’s a pretty broad statement but one of my pet peeves. Some examples;
- Talking on your phone while at the register and especially completely ignoring the human being who is trying to help you and probably asked you how your day is going, and deserves your attention.
- Talking or texting or any other interaction with your phone at a restaurant when your server is trying to take your order.
- Phones at the dinner table.
- Texting at red lights then completely missing the light to the chagrin of the line of cars, with people in them, behind you
- Texting at the red light then continuing to text while driving in order to get through the light, then proceeding to drive 10 miles an hour, swerving precariously. While getting on the highway.
- Playing a game or checking your Facebook or email while engaged in a conversation with a friend. Hint – there is no engagement.
- Same with texting. If you have to text while in the presence of another living breathing human being who expected your complete attention, let them know the text is important, send a reply then put the phone down.
- Reading a text and not answering, ever. Did you know most people’s phones have that little feature that now tells them if their message was read or not?
- Kind of how it’s pretty obvious when you reject a call vs. letting it go to voicemail. The only time it is really acceptable to reject a call is if you forgot to turn off your ringer and you are in church, or something. And those pesky bill collectors occasionally. I’m sure there are a few more exceptions but you get my drift right?
- Crossing the street while texting and tripping over the hood of a car. Fun fact- my daughter recently wrote a paper about the pros and cons of making texting and walking against the law. I get texting and driving – but texting and walking is going a little too far. Where has common sense gone and why do those who have it have to suffer more because some people don’t? Rhetorical, and pointless question I know. If someone is silly and senseless enough to walk through a major intersection while texting, or worse jaywalk, they deserve to get hit. May knock some sense into them
- That was sorta mean. Sorry.
- Not really
Then of course we have the basics of text etiquette, which put a lot more succinctly than my original, post are as follows and still true, even more so actually;
- Treat a text conversation as you would a phone call or a face to face conversation. Wait, forget the face to face as that probably leads to more texting.
- Try to get back to the person who sends a message in a timely manner – 1 hour is tops. Otherwise you might as well just pretend you didn’t get it.
- ok not really that’s rude and dishonest. acknowledgment is important.
- observe the acceptable times of a phone call to text someone, unless you know them well and know their habits. 9 am to 9 pm.
- Don’t text big news – pregnant, engaged, coming out, murder (especially important if you’d like not to get caught. I don’t care if you delete the message, it will get pulled out of someone’s ass just when you thought you’d get away with it if it weren’t for those meddling kids!)
- don’t text the wrong person (especially if it’s in relation to murder and requesting help hiding the body)
- don’t send dick pics if not specifically invited to – or nudes, or innuendos. If you wouldn’t do it to the person’s face, don’t invade their phone.
- keep messages short and sweet
- don’t keep texting at 5 or 2 minute intervals to get the attention of someone who hasn’t texted you back. That is annoying, bordering on stalkerish and will (most likely) backfire.
- don’t fight or break up or propose over text – goes with the big news thing but deserves it’s own rule. Just don’t.
- try to use some of the English language correctly and punctuate especially for emphasis. Wow can be construed a completely different way than Wow!
- Don’t give the POTUS attention by acknowledging his Tweets – it just inspires him. Same for any other attention seeking whore.
Just seeing if you are still paying attention.
Enjoy the phones for the entertainment and ability to connect even more with others they offer but don’t do it at the expense of a real human being.
Be kind, be engaged, be polite. Don’t text and drive – or walk through intersections and text for that matter. People have died – is a text worth your life or a black eye for being rude?
Good manners will never hurt anyone.