Walk Away

walk awayWalk away- by all means it makes the most sense.
Don’t worry about me wondering what I did to cause it,
even though it wasn’t anything I did.
Walk away- even though you promised
you would be honest about whether you would do this
or if you would stay
but first lie – tell me more about
how you like me and want me

tell me how we are friends,
you admire and respect me
then turn your back and walk away

I understand you don’t want to be bothered
with feelings and thoughts deeper then your own.
I understand you don’t want to get caught up
risk your heart, reap the bounty you could sow
I see that you don’t mean what you say.
You say what you think soothes my mind?
My mind and your inaction
say you are walking
Why use empty words to hide,
Something that wouldn’t be wrong
if you would open your heart

not be afraid to feel
Never mind
just go,
walk away.
Take what I have given
leave nothing in return
I never expected the world,
Only a friend, I thought you understood
Do I scare you by feeling the way that I feel
By challenging you to dig deep?
Not accepting your excuses for locking away
the part I saw very well
before from me, you thought it would keep
Who you are and who you could be
to me, to yourself.
By not feeling, you deny my existence
When you go, please know,
It won’t be like you never were here
in the depths of my mind
the hollows of my heart.
Forget me, I won’t forget you
Just an empty space where you said you would be
your words as you turn and walk away

I’m not just some dumb girl,  I’m real
I am human, I feel
and you hurt me by telling me lies.
Was  it easier for you to deny?
Then to look in my eyes and tell me the truth
That you aren’t the one that I see?
You can’t be you say, your excuse,
You won,t be, won’t that’s the truth
Your words say I am special,
a prize for someone.
I respect that it isn’t you.
But walking away
when its the one thing I asked
says I’m nothing.
So please by all means, walk away

Wait! I am curious what was it I did
so bad that you had to do the one thing
I asked and you promised
would never put me thru 
but look where we are try denying it.
Answer me once
for the times you ignored me,

what did I do to deserve
to have 
you
come in my life,

invade my being
then just turn your back
and walk away.

Something? Anything?
Can you please help me out?
You don’t know how much this is hurting &
I don’t want to believe you don’t care
Have some compassion for someone
who gave with no strings,
no binding,

took nothing you did not gladly offer
then took back and left me reeling.
Your offer was empty
now it looks as if I am needy
and that’s not how you told it to me
You have spun it around
it’s not me who is lacking
You wouldn’t be if you tried,
to be who you said,
who I saw, who you are
looking for answers to life’s questions
you forgot or don’t care anymore?
You are cold and rude and who are you?
Not who I thought,
a man of your word.
The proof is behind you
with a bruised heart,
watching as you walk away 

In the end, for all
that you said wasn’t true

I was just another warm body 
Take from what you want
until you were done.  
You are the one
who lost out
by keeping me at a distance
so why is it me who is sad and full of self-doubt
when I know it is you walking away

People come people go
in and out of our lives,
it/s life it the way things are.
When one says hello
steps in for while you expect them
to also say goodbye
or make it so the door
can stay open for later
not just walk away with no word.


Maybe you thought of me while walking away
thought this would do the least damage
Your words tell me to stay in your life
but I see don’t stay in your actions
Maybe its to save yourself from facing
the fact that you aren’t up for the task
of taking on my darkness
as well as my light
There is no shame in it
if you say it, I get it
but if you just hope ignoring me
not answering, will get the message across no problem

I don’t get it, I can’t see. I hold on to what you told me
the damage of leaving me wondering
beyond hope of repair
I keep reaching out and
every time it’s harder

I leave myself so open to hurt

I should just stop trying
let you off the hook to go on your way
but the price for me is so much higher
if you won’t be here, why should I pay

I have a life sentence and what, tell me, was my crime?
Believe me if I could go, I would run
In true form irony, since I am already bound you who could
give me reprieve will instead walk away, leaving none

My chains are not breaking
I curse fate for its unfairness

My soul while I breath will not be free
So lie to me then leave me hanging
whats another unanswered question to me

I’m too tired to care, too tired of hurt
I can’t make you tell me anything that’s real
You say what gets you out of the hot seat,
do you even know what you feel?

You do, I am sure
you know who you are
Can’t you just talk to me
is it so much to ask?

never mind, go,  

walk away

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

©LizzieC2012
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24 thoughts on “Walk Away

  1. Lizzie, I recognize this person who walked away. They are incapable of and undeserving of your love and loyalty. I also understand your pain. One day you will set yourself free of the binds that hold you. You will be free.

    Love,
    Gail

    1. thank you Gail.. i think .. that maybe its trying to have relationships and fit them into the little boxes and shapes of normal..whatever that is that are the chains… does one notice so much what they dont have when there is nothing for comparison?

  2. If you need a shoulder, mine are narrow but really strong. If you need a hug, I give really really good ones, or so I am told.

    Nothing else, just a shoulder, a hug or an ear to listen no interruptions I will just listen.

    1. thank you … I do appreciate that very much- you know the oddest thing, when I write about what i am feeling.. its like when you eat something that makes you nauseaous and you know you are going to be sick but it is there and you can’t do anything, until you finally get sick and get it out of your system..once its gone…in awhile you forget you didn;t feel good…

  3. Wow,you don’t mess around.
    If this was about a real person, I hope the poem is an exorcism and you can dismiss them from your mind, because they really don’t deserve to be there.

    And real or not, fantastic poem!

  4. This was a terrific poem Lizzie. I’m so glad you got to say everything you needed to say here. I know it won’t bring them back, but at least it got it out. This is too powerful to keep inside – it was absolutely brilliant!

  5. This line is so true: “I understand you don’t want to be bothered
    with feelings and thoughts deeper then your own.” And “he” is the one who lost out.
    … a very emotional piece Lizzie. Digging this now 🙂

  6. Powerful, emotional, and truthful. This verse means much to me:
    People come people go
    in and out of our lives,
    it/s life it the way things are.
    When one says hello
    steps in for while you expect them
    to also say goodbye
    or make it so the door
    can stay open for later
    not just walk away with no word.

    1. That was a particualrly tough one so I am glad that it stands out – tough because I wanted to convey that saying goodbye doesn;t have to mean never saying hello again that if things are handled – if we are mindful of others we can make a goodbye – more of a Im out for a bit – lets see what happens.. but ignoring someone – flat out disregarding attempts to communicate.. .leaves so much that is hard to overcome – for me.. I wonder endlessly what did I do – and when I know I didn;t do anything … I become very ..sad that it might be just because i am .. cracked a little more than some people want to deal with.. it’s ok. but i would rather be told.

      1. It’s like when a nice neighbor moves away … even to the opposite side of the country. Whereas if they say “Goodbye”, I suggest … nope – not goodbye (which seems too final) – but See you later!

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