slightly cracked observations and unsolicited advice on bending the rules and being yourself…and butterflies
Lamentations of a Dick Magnet
21 thoughts on “Lamentations of a Dick Magnet”
You seem to be a freak magnet 🙂 Hopefully you will magnetize a freak of the good kind, not just Mr. Dick…
You think? Gosh that would be cool 🙂 I hope he comes soon though, I am not a spring chicken anymopre…actually I just think it would be a shame to let my freaky side get complacent and THEN find him…
“I am a gift”… I LOVE that!
And I have a feeling that strong, intelligent women are “statistically” just as likely to attract (and for whatever reason, WANT) the dicks in the world… I speak from past experience on that one… But I can also speak from experience to say fairy tales aren’t out of reach either! 😉 Took me 14 years to wise up and divorce the dick in my life… And discover Prince Charming is a real guy too. 🙂
I agree with you – statistically any of us can be the one.. I only still believe in fairy tales because of stories like yours 🙂
I’m gonna go with none of what they did is your fault, lizziecracked. And don’t let anyone change your compassionate nature.
If they try, maybe put dick magnets in the tips of your Doc Maartens and let ’em fly…
Nah – I am done trying to be someone I am not.. It wont help me to try and not be compassionate and just who I am – but now I know that it is one of the qualities that makes me an easy target. If I wasn’t who I am, I wouldn’t put up with the crap but I can dish out some crap my darn self and don’t think a person should be judged on only their bad behavior – or that it is even my place to judge anyone at all – so I am the perfect girl for an abusive asshole – I mean a dick. I like your idea – maybe I will just go ahead and take the precautions lol..
Don’t be too hard on yourself, Lizzy, as far as attracting dicks goes. I think we’re experiencing in this day and age a dick epidemic! There’s a whole ocean of dicks out there who — if they’ve learned anything at all — it’s that they need to hide who they really are from you — at least for awhile until they are “safely ensconced” and can go back to being their dicky selves. At least you can kick them out, but THEY are sentenced to live inside their own dickheads for the rest of their lives because there’s no way in hell they will ever be come self aware. Not in this life anyway.
Of course, there are lots of great guys out there too. But I think you have to be really really picky. Keep your heart under lock and key until they have proven they’re worthy of you. 🙂
Lol Linda – I like that – I can kick them out but THEY are sentenced to a life inside their own heads …YEA!
I heard something on Oprah’s Master Class last night “the way how muscle building works is that micro fibers are torn and then repaired. When they are repaired, they get stronger. Relationships operate in a similar manner. When you are hurt, you will heal and become stronger.”
It is true that you do teach people how to treat you and you also learn from your experiences. These two tools are essential when living in a world full of “dicks” 🙂
Whenever something bad happens to me, I say to myself “This too shall pass”
Holy crap that is like the standard saying in my family. And it always does too.
It is crazy how your post spoke the thoughts that have been rolling around in my head for a long time. I too have lived my whole life this way, especially when it comes to men. The one I am with now, my ex husband, I have been with for almost 20 years. He has done every possible thing a person can do to hurt another person. And yet, after being divorced for 4 years, I decided to give it another try. Needless to say, that was one of the worse decisions of my life. I was fine on my own, I was happy, strong, secure, confident and my spirit was alive. Now, not so much. He has started the destruction of my soul yet again
In Steve Job’s Stanford speech, he said that if you haven’t found your passion as yet, never give up. Never settle. Keep searching. The same thing can be applied to relationships, I think.
You’re a beautiful, smart and empowered woman. Never settle. If you’re not being treated the way you think you should be treated, never settle.
But I’ve always said that no one can force a person to make a decision. The person has to decide that on their own. All external people can do is make suggestions.
Good luck with that though. Peace 🙂
Im so sorry to hear that. I hope you do what you need to do to be happy and strong and secure and confident, despite him. Its not an easy thing to stop the destruction merely by being aware of it. I had given someone who hurt me deeply in many ways another chance and I saw that it would never be any different. Its hard to let go but better to let go of him than to lose yourself…
Peace 🙂
Hi Lizzie! I thoroughly enjoyed this. I, too, have felt like I’ve had the target on my back my whole life. And it’s not just for dicks. It’s for assholes, bastards, and son-of-a-bitches too. It’s not just in relationships, either.
Unfortunately, I realized why there was a target on my back. I was willing to help others who looked wounded and vulnerable. It’s the whole dying animal routine, where they feign injury to lure prey. “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.” And I showed them my injuries. And I was prey after that.
It’s incredible how someone can completely contort a person’s mind. But, that’s how these predators operate. Smokes and mirrors, all of the way. They prey on those wounds and make them worse. They pull the carpet out and let someone they love fall some more. They create new vulnerabilities.
I had to learn it the hard way. But, my son won’t. Don’t take shit. You are who you are, and if that’s not good enough for someone, they can piss off. And only help people who are brave enough to ask for help. You help, and then you’re on your way. And only ever give a second chance after a person has demeaned themselves to beg on their knees.
I think the hardest part for me is understanding how they operate – you almost cant fathom this kind of bahavior without consciousness and yet I can’t fathom how somebody could be so …conniving..I dunno
🙂 Peace
Well, I’m going to guess that some of them are dyed-in-the-wool sociopaths. That’s the only explanation for some of them. Others were probably just not raised to know any better. That’s how they operate. Their parents showed them how to be complete jerks, and that’s how they live.
Oh I agree .i married a certifiable sociopath..true story .its the high number that gravitate my way…lol …or did.
Lizzie, I too have been there (um, multiple times.) Once I learned to set boundaries and to stop choosing dickheads, their attraction to me became irrelevant. Good luck, you are so worth it!
Shouldn’t there be a book issued and a test taken before they let us loose to the wolves? lol… the best lessons are learned by experience I guess but they also tend to hurt more. Thanks for reading and commenting 🙂
We are worth it!
This so needs a love button, Chica. ❤ Truly. YOU need to read it again. ❤ Much love my beautiful, kind, forgiving, lovable friend ❤ xxx
I have read it many times in the last few days..weeks.. I dont know what ima looking for in it but – I shared it with the current ..friend. I am done though.. with the whole mess for awhile..you know – i can send the link on my phone.. maybe someone else needs to get the messsage? problem is its lost on the dicks.. cause they dont realize they fall into that category..
I did use the I am a gift line.. I felt pretty damn good about it too! ♥
You seem to be a freak magnet 🙂 Hopefully you will magnetize a freak of the good kind, not just Mr. Dick…
You think? Gosh that would be cool 🙂 I hope he comes soon though, I am not a spring chicken anymopre…actually I just think it would be a shame to let my freaky side get complacent and THEN find him…
“I am a gift”… I LOVE that!
And I have a feeling that strong, intelligent women are “statistically” just as likely to attract (and for whatever reason, WANT) the dicks in the world… I speak from past experience on that one… But I can also speak from experience to say fairy tales aren’t out of reach either! 😉 Took me 14 years to wise up and divorce the dick in my life… And discover Prince Charming is a real guy too. 🙂
I agree with you – statistically any of us can be the one.. I only still believe in fairy tales because of stories like yours 🙂
I’m gonna go with none of what they did is your fault, lizziecracked. And don’t let anyone change your compassionate nature.
If they try, maybe put dick magnets in the tips of your Doc Maartens and let ’em fly…
Nah – I am done trying to be someone I am not.. It wont help me to try and not be compassionate and just who I am – but now I know that it is one of the qualities that makes me an easy target. If I wasn’t who I am, I wouldn’t put up with the crap but I can dish out some crap my darn self and don’t think a person should be judged on only their bad behavior – or that it is even my place to judge anyone at all – so I am the perfect girl for an abusive asshole – I mean a dick. I like your idea – maybe I will just go ahead and take the precautions lol..
Don’t be too hard on yourself, Lizzy, as far as attracting dicks goes. I think we’re experiencing in this day and age a dick epidemic! There’s a whole ocean of dicks out there who — if they’ve learned anything at all — it’s that they need to hide who they really are from you — at least for awhile until they are “safely ensconced” and can go back to being their dicky selves. At least you can kick them out, but THEY are sentenced to live inside their own dickheads for the rest of their lives because there’s no way in hell they will ever be come self aware. Not in this life anyway.
Of course, there are lots of great guys out there too. But I think you have to be really really picky. Keep your heart under lock and key until they have proven they’re worthy of you. 🙂
Lol Linda – I like that – I can kick them out but THEY are sentenced to a life inside their own heads …YEA!
I heard something on Oprah’s Master Class last night “the way how muscle building works is that micro fibers are torn and then repaired. When they are repaired, they get stronger. Relationships operate in a similar manner. When you are hurt, you will heal and become stronger.”
It is true that you do teach people how to treat you and you also learn from your experiences. These two tools are essential when living in a world full of “dicks” 🙂
Whenever something bad happens to me, I say to myself “This too shall pass”
Holy crap that is like the standard saying in my family. And it always does too.
It is crazy how your post spoke the thoughts that have been rolling around in my head for a long time. I too have lived my whole life this way, especially when it comes to men. The one I am with now, my ex husband, I have been with for almost 20 years. He has done every possible thing a person can do to hurt another person. And yet, after being divorced for 4 years, I decided to give it another try. Needless to say, that was one of the worse decisions of my life. I was fine on my own, I was happy, strong, secure, confident and my spirit was alive. Now, not so much. He has started the destruction of my soul yet again
In Steve Job’s Stanford speech, he said that if you haven’t found your passion as yet, never give up. Never settle. Keep searching. The same thing can be applied to relationships, I think.
You’re a beautiful, smart and empowered woman. Never settle. If you’re not being treated the way you think you should be treated, never settle.
But I’ve always said that no one can force a person to make a decision. The person has to decide that on their own. All external people can do is make suggestions.
Good luck with that though. Peace 🙂
Im so sorry to hear that. I hope you do what you need to do to be happy and strong and secure and confident, despite him. Its not an easy thing to stop the destruction merely by being aware of it. I had given someone who hurt me deeply in many ways another chance and I saw that it would never be any different. Its hard to let go but better to let go of him than to lose yourself…
Peace 🙂
Hi Lizzie! I thoroughly enjoyed this. I, too, have felt like I’ve had the target on my back my whole life. And it’s not just for dicks. It’s for assholes, bastards, and son-of-a-bitches too. It’s not just in relationships, either.
Unfortunately, I realized why there was a target on my back. I was willing to help others who looked wounded and vulnerable. It’s the whole dying animal routine, where they feign injury to lure prey. “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.” And I showed them my injuries. And I was prey after that.
It’s incredible how someone can completely contort a person’s mind. But, that’s how these predators operate. Smokes and mirrors, all of the way. They prey on those wounds and make them worse. They pull the carpet out and let someone they love fall some more. They create new vulnerabilities.
I had to learn it the hard way. But, my son won’t. Don’t take shit. You are who you are, and if that’s not good enough for someone, they can piss off. And only help people who are brave enough to ask for help. You help, and then you’re on your way. And only ever give a second chance after a person has demeaned themselves to beg on their knees.
I think the hardest part for me is understanding how they operate – you almost cant fathom this kind of bahavior without consciousness and yet I can’t fathom how somebody could be so …conniving..I dunno
🙂 Peace
Well, I’m going to guess that some of them are dyed-in-the-wool sociopaths. That’s the only explanation for some of them. Others were probably just not raised to know any better. That’s how they operate. Their parents showed them how to be complete jerks, and that’s how they live.
Oh I agree .i married a certifiable sociopath..true story .its the high number that gravitate my way…lol …or did.
Lizzie, I too have been there (um, multiple times.) Once I learned to set boundaries and to stop choosing dickheads, their attraction to me became irrelevant. Good luck, you are so worth it!
Shouldn’t there be a book issued and a test taken before they let us loose to the wolves? lol… the best lessons are learned by experience I guess but they also tend to hurt more. Thanks for reading and commenting 🙂
We are worth it!
This so needs a love button, Chica. ❤ Truly. YOU need to read it again. ❤ Much love my beautiful, kind, forgiving, lovable friend ❤ xxx
I have read it many times in the last few days..weeks.. I dont know what ima looking for in it but – I shared it with the current ..friend. I am done though.. with the whole mess for awhile..you know – i can send the link on my phone.. maybe someone else needs to get the messsage? problem is its lost on the dicks.. cause they dont realize they fall into that category..
I did use the I am a gift line.. I felt pretty damn good about it too! ♥