…..& Other Shit You Learn When You Are Trying to Talk to Your Kids.
Have you ever been talking to your kids about something important, well to you anyways, and realized they didn’t hear a word?
It frustrates me to no end. I try to not give too much advice and yet sometimes I feel compelled to. I am a believer in teaching them to make the right choices based on their beliefs and values and then letting them screw up for themselves before I offer advice. I just have to trust they have learned enough from me what not to do, that they will do the right thing. Most importantly I want them to make the best choices for them not for anybody else.
Everybody knows that kids learn how to tune out their mothers. What they hear is similar to the teacher on Charlie Brown Cartoons. Mwuah mwuah mwuah mwuah mwuah. I think it is because they are desensitized to the sound of their mother’s voice. Why else would the phrase “just wait til your father gets home”, be a common household utterance. Because Mom is fed up and knows the kids will listen to Dad.
As a single parent I don’t have the option of such utterances to get my kids to listen. Sure if its something really obnoxious I might throw the occasional I’ll call Grandpa or wait til I tell your Uncle but I try to use them sparingly as my Dad has already served his time and my brother has his own kids waiting til he gets home. Each of them has their way of avoiding hearing me when they are not in the mood to listen. The most annoying to me by far is my 16 yo son, who will nod his head and act like he cares what I say and then when I am finished say “you are just crazy Mom that is all that is.” ARRRGGGHHHHH
But my favorite avoidance technique is the random facts I learn when I think I am imparting some great wisdom on my kids.
My 18yo daughter and I were having a discussion this morning which at some point I did not realize turned into a monologue, me being the featured speaker. I failed to notice when her eyes glazed over and felt like I was giving her some really good advice. I did not see that she was paying more attention to her little puppy sprawled out beside her wanting a belly rub than she was to me. When I stopped talking and she did not say anything I asked if that made any sense. Instead of confirmation she looked at me and said…
“Dog balls feel funny.”
Well ok then, another completely random statement to add to the 553,271 I already have.
Glad I could help.