Waxing Barbaric, and Other Stupid Beauty Philosophy to Stay Fabulous after 40

it isn't??

So I had a reader write to me and say..

(using the You Rock Lizzie choice in the drop down menu on my contact page) 

Lizzie!  I can’t believe you are over 40.  How do you do it?  You look so much younger.  Can you tell us what you do to look so fantastic?

OK, 

Not really.

Truth of the matter is, I just finished waxing my eyebrows.  I am always amazed at the difference a little eyebrow grooming can make in your ..uh my, appearance.  And there comes a point where tweezing the stragglers doesn’t cut it. It’s true.

Barbaric but true.

It got me thinking about some of the weird and somewhat barbaric things that we, women, do to be pretty, to stay pretty, especially as we age.

And so I thought AHA!  I will not only give you my slightly cracked observations on beauty rituals but add, as a bonus, unsolicited advice and my little tips and tricks.  Oh boy I know you are on the edge of your seats.

My favorite stupid beauty philosophy is something my mother always told me.  Especially when it hurt.

You must suffer to be beautiful.

Oh really?  Says who?

I have done my fair share of suffering in the name of beauty and did not reap the rewards.

The home perm in 4th grade?  Oh yeah I suffered mightily with only a minimal amount of bitching because the pay off was going to be a beautiful head of curls.

Didn’t quite work out that way.  I suffered all right.  for a lot longer than was humanly bearable.  We aren’t going to talk about anymore it’s painful.  I mean if you must suffer to be beautiful than it makes sense that the amount of suffering should reflect the payoff.  Should being the pivotal word.  Things don’t always work out the way we plan.

Allow me to be completely full of myself for just a moment, if you will

If you won’t then cover your eyes or do what you have to, because I am going all out big-headed full of myself.

I am pretty (witty too but that’s for another day)

I have never really had to work at it.  Sorry it’s just the truth.  In fact,  I went through much of my young adult years (that would be chronologically not mentally – don’t confuse me with a real adult :-)  ) completely oblivious to the fact that I am, or was,  pretty easy on the eyes.

I got lucky with great genes.  I didn’t have to do a thing.  I never had acne, my hair has always been amazingly thick and fast growing and I have cheekbones.  Yes they are built-in.

18

The women in my family age amazingly well and the worst skin problem, on my face I have ever had to contend with is pregnancy mask.  And a scar from a chicken pock that we thought was a zit because I only had like three on my entire body.  I was 12, we thought it was the beginning of the dreaded teen skin issues.

I didn’t earn it, being pretty.  And I took it for granted.

I have never been about, correction, I was for a bit but I lost that need for,  girly girl beauty stuff.  I think it was probably in the Army.  I had to keep my nails short, could only wear makeup in Class A uniform and was allowed a simple wedding band and a pair of stud earrings for jewelry.  That’s it.

You do – or don’t do something for 6 years and it gets to be ingrained.  I used to pride myself and delight my significant others that  I could get ready in less than 10 minutes and look damn good (by their standards).

I didn’t have to put makeup on to got to the store.  I didn’t have to do my hair to go anywhere.  I could get out of bed in the morning and look, maybe a little rumpled.. but that can be sexy, or so I’ve heard. more than a few times,  and pull it off with no problem.

No problemo.  Zip.  Zilch.

I just didn’t , and didn’t have to,worry about how I looked.

25

Yea well, I am here to tell you that it can bite you in the ass and catch up to you really fast.

Like as soon as you turn 40.

And I admit that while I wasn’t trying to look good, I was living pretty rough.  As in all the things you shouldn’t do to keep your looks when you get older.  I drank, smoked and partied hard.  Lack of sleep, which is still troublesome,  and abused my body in ways …I don’t want to even think about, nevermind discussing them here.  Although there might be one or two good stories.

Ok enough.  It is catching up to me as it will to each one of you if it hasn’t already.  And to combat this inevitable droop, because it really is all about gravity finally getting a hold on your less than elastic skin and um….other parts as well,  bottom line, I have succumbed to a little suffering to be beautiful.

Sigh..

Lizzie’s Head to Toe Fabulous after 40 Beauty Secrets.

(secrets sounds so much better, don;t you think like I have something everyone wants..  hee hee )

Hair 

Since I have an easy breezy wash and go style haircut, I don’t subject my hair to the heat of styling devices or product on a daily basis.  I do occasionally, but it has served me well as my hair is still thick and healthy when some women are starting to see theirs thin and become brittle.

I color it because I have this grey streak, just one streak that was really really cool in my mid-thirties, but let’s face it ladies and gents, when women get greys they start to look old.  Men look distinguished, women look old.

I was the most earthy and natural girl out there, loudly proclaiming I would grow old gracefully, but as soon as I saw how much older I looked, I am not doing it.

Color.  And highlights.  Worth every bit of time and money you invest in them.

I buy whatever box color is on sale that has low and highlights built-in.  Bam.  Done.

Face

36

I never needed foundation, and hated wearing it.  I don’t get the whole complete face mask part of makeup.  Make up should enhance our looks not change them to something they aren’t, so much so that you refuse to be seen in the morning until you put your face on.

Ok so I am not really happy that the creases from the pillow takes three times as long to disappear in the morning,  but make up will not help the matter.  And a lot of make up has a funny smell.  A glamour night is one thing, daily plaster is another.  To each their own but for me, less is best.

Unfortunately after 40 none is not working anymore.

So I use the bare minimum everyday, lipstick and mascara, eyeliner if I have 2 extra minutes, a face perfecter that bounces light to reduce the appearance of A.G.E. and anything I can find to cover up the damn black circles that never go away.

More importantly, I finally have come to realize the benefit of washing with a gentle cleanser twice a day and moisturizer with a SPF 25 or higher, product during the day and a restorative concoction at night that fights fee radicals and all the other junk it is supposed to do.

The power of suggestion is strong with anti-aging stuff and you really can tell a difference in the morning.

Oh to get back all those years I neglected this important step, the days I slept with make up on.  With my anti-aging, restorative stuff I use now, I would look 12.

Boobs

Sure I could put boobs in with body, but I really wanted to point out something important about boobs.

36 DD may be smoking hot at 23, but at 43 after a couple a kids – actually just one is enough to do it –  you end up with the equivalent of 2 old gym socks with sand in the bottom.

I kid you not.

I, fortunately, do not have this problem but for the first time in my life,…   no that’s not true.

I have never worried too much about my boob size.  At all.  It is what it is, and I have run the gamut from a minimalistic A to generous DD due to weight gain and loss, and babies and all kinds of stuff.

You would not believe how big boobies get during pregnancy and wow hold your hats during the first few months of breast-feeding.  My body naturally wants to stay at a reasonable handful (each) and where I was going with that was …

All you women that are worried about your smaller boobs and feel inadequate in some way – stop.  When you are my age..  it will be YOU that has it going on.  Not the buxom babes of our youth.  Sorry buxom babes.

 But I can offer this advice...  Support support support.  And after 40, wear a bra when you go out.  Nothing gives away your age like your boobies peeking out below your shirtline.  Just saying.  If I had big boobs, they would be properly encased at all times, in public.

If it makes you feel any better, I have problems with my ass.  Ok?  I got lucky in the boob department but when it comes to my ass.. I got one that just won’t quit.  And not in a good way.  Although is still is looking pretty damn good for my age, and 6 kids.

Moving on…

Drink lots of water.

Stretch.  I do it at least once a week.   :???:

Body and facial hair

I wax my eyebrows.  I didn’t discover the awesomeness of this until I was 34.    It hurts.  There is suffering and I am one of those that puffs up the instant the wax is ripped off.  Which is why I limit waxing to my eyebrows.  I, again luckily, have no facial hair to contend with except one hair on my chin that keeps coming back.  I pluck that puppy the instant it appears.

As far as eyebrows go – the pain is worth it.  We don’t like angry eyebrows and nothing says angry like a unibrow and bushy brows.  I don’t care how happy you are.  Wax.  I can’t say it enough.  Wax.

I shave my legs when I think about it, or on special occasions.  I have been called a hippy chick, I have been in positions where I wish I had done it.  But it’s not the end of the world,  and guys the only thing I have to say to any of you that are thinking eww right now?

If you are gonna kiss me with that 2 day facial hair growth then you shouldn’t  have much to say about me wrapping my legs around you with 2 or 3 days worth of stubble right ?

Nuff Said!

In fact. I tire of talking about beauty so I am just going to tell you;

my number one secret to staying fabulous and pretty after 40.  (and in fact being more so than  I was at 20)

Confidence. and Knowledge

It isn’t all about how I look, its a package deal.  I may not be a beauty queen but I got it going on from the inside out.  All these little tricks I have told you before, they only work because I have the confidence to pull it off.

Yes I had to suffer a little (ok, a lot) to get here.  So my mom was right.  But it was worth it.

I am smart enough, I am good enough and I am pretty enough and gosh darn it… that makes me beautiful.

Let’s hear someone argue with THAT beauty philosophy?

Yeah, didn’t think so.

Lizzie Cracked (never broken) but still fabulous and over 40.

5 minutes ago - Hey my nose is crooked :-)

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34 responses to “Waxing Barbaric, and Other Stupid Beauty Philosophy to Stay Fabulous after 40

  1. perfect has a way of sneaking up. Suddenly we figure it out, all the crap they tried to convince us of is really just worthless and we are going to be just perfect just the way we are without it.

  2. Loved this… I’ve noticed that the last few years I’ve become borderline obsessed with the aging crap that’s going on with my face… At work we have an elevator with a mirror on the ceiling… if you look straight up at yourself it’s an instant facelift. ;) My co-worker and I make sure to go in there at least once a day… LOL

  3. That damn chin-hair. I just plucked mine tonight. Where did it come from? I’m cruising along with only the eyebrows to contend with when bam, I have a hair on my chinny-chin-chin! (I couldn’t help it.)

    • lol – oh i so thought about it :-) good one. It is annoying as hell though and if I don;t catch it ..it has gotten to over an inch long only once… cause at first its stiff but then it softens as it grows… and it keep coming back .. just one. same spot. Annooying.

  4. Lizzie – I had no idea you were so gorgeous! I always knew you were beautiful on the inside, but I had no idea what you looked like on the outside. You’re my friend so you could look like a troll & I would still like you, but it’s a pleasant surprise to see your actual face. I agree – natural is better.

    • awww :oops: thank you ..!! there has to be an added beauty benefit to knowing your friends will like you as a troll or a girl :-) adds to the confidence thing – such a sweet and wonderful thing to say.. I got a warm fuzzy ..

    • thank you :-) I probably have more of the crooked head thing going on too – when I put glasses on one side sits higher than the other.. or lower.. crooked. I have no cartiledge in the very tip of my nose and have broken it once – maybe twice so it seems to be growing askew.. kinda adds character don;t you think? ;-)

    • I feel ya! I was really trying to find a picture of that perm to add to the post. It was horrid and the whole time my mom was giving it to me I had visions in my head of glorious beauty… sigh…

  5. It’s interesting to see where people fall on the “suffering for beauty” issue. I think you’re SO LUCKY that you’ve got good genes because some people really do have to suffer just to look like a normal human being. I’m one of them ;)

    I think beauty is very subjective, and so how much we suffer for it is directly related to that. If you value blonde hair, a tan and perfectly white teeth you’re going to have to have some work done most likely. If you are like me and don’t mind your pale skin and brunette hair, life is a little easier.

    Wonderful post, Lizzie. And yes, you are beautiful!

    • There is true beauty in acceptance of who we are and what we have to work with too… that’s part of the confidence thing too and feeling comfortable in your own skin. As we get older things happen that make us change our ideas too.. Thanks Jen, and you too are beautiful :-)

    • thank you :-) Ya know I think time can be kinder to us when we are happy with ourselves too… I look in the mirror and see the face of .. no more than the me at 36.. If we feel good we tend to be able to see it as well as show it to others..

      • You’re right there …I like who I am now more than any other time in my life…I’m not as attractive certainly and it does take some getting used to looking in the mirror and wondering exactly when you changed so much in appearance …but then I think I’ve earned the gray hairs etc. and I am at peace with myself …and that means a lot Diane

  6. You’ve hit the nail right on its head, sis. Nothing is sexier than a female oozing with self-esteem and air of careless confidence. Plus lots of moisturizer and sunblock. We are both drinking from the same fountain of youth (but yours has vodka in it, to add to the vavavoom). Hugs from the Asian blogosphere.

    Keep on smiling (or should I say cracking up?)

    • LOL thanks :-) I wish someone had told us this little secret years ago. I was watching some young girls at a fair the other night and they were so pretty but so …uncomfortable. I almost hurt for them thinking of the thoughts that might be going through their heads.. so focused probably on their perceived flaws and worried about hiding them that …ahhh it was hard to watch and I just wanted to go offer them some word of advice.. BUT who listens at that age and they probably would looked at me and said omg this old lady is trying to tell US about being beautiful? lol… Alas no more vodka in my fountain of youth but it’s still all good.. Thanks and you keep smiling too – you are radiant :-)

  7. Lizzie! How pretty you are! And perfect skin too! You are soooo lucky! :) Well, my other two daughters are beautiful too so I’m not surprised at all that my cyber daugher is beautiful (on the inside too of course!) And you do not look 40! And what a great attitude you have towards yourself. Oh what a blessing it is to be comfortable in your own skin! You ROCK Lizzie!

    And I agree with all your beauty tips. I haven’t waxed my eyebrows in a while — just been doing a haphazard job of plucking. Now I’m motivated to stop in a get a pro to do it. I’ve often wanted to try threading. If I do I’ll let you know how I like it.

    I did get lucky in the hair department. I can honestly say at 60 I don’t have a single gray hair!

    • Thank You :-) and if my cyber sisters take after our MOM then they are beautiful inside and out as well :-)

      No gray hairs? Not one? wowwwww.. I did my eyebrows myself this time ..I think next time I will get them done at the salon. Totally worth it. Plus you don’t know exactly when the pain is coming so you don;t flinch as much…

  8. I think we graduated from the same cosmetology school. Momma told me I only had one skin, so I had best take care of it. So far, that stuck. To me, a day with no brassiere, is like…night. Not happening.

    This post was fun. I may have to steal it in an upcoming episode, as I am often asked the same thing…but it is normally after I admit to ten children. I get the whole, “You look amazing for ten children!” I A.L.W.A.Y.S. ask, “Why because I do not need a bib and a walker?”

    Yes, I can be like that :P

    {HUGZ}
    Red.

  9. Pingback: The Look, Mid-Afternoon Mental Moment | Running Naked With Scissors·

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